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2023-09-11 - 1:31 p.m.
I know that somewhere in the past twenty some years, I have posted a similar post as I'm about to do now. But, it's a significant day. And I'm prone to PTSD and ruminating. So, I'm chilling out today. The mosquitos are rampant in Michigan right now and the cloud layer is thick (not like the day those planes crashed, that day started as one of the most beautiful days I have ever seen) So I'm using all of that as an excuse to just shut myself in and cry. On this day, all those years ago, I got to work at 5:30 am or so. I opened the place. I had to set up a billion waters which we stacked on trays so we could just grab and go. And huge vats of coffee. I loved that job. It was the most efficient place I've ever worked. At 6:30, when we opened, we would immediately get flooded with people. TV's and cell phones weren't much of a thing back then. So we weren't all tuned into what was happening. A couple hours later a customer came in and told us something really bad was happening and my boss went to his office to turn on the TV he had for sporting events and we all just huddled around it in shock. We closed early that day. I rushed home and turned the TV on. And then I got that call from the police that my mother had been in an accident. My mother. You think *I* make drama? My mother totaled her car on 9/11. You can't make this shit up. Anyway, this day, the thousands of people who lost those lives and the impact this day had on the world, yep, it grounds me. Puts me in a place of mind where I know I need to be kind and focused and not let something like that ever happen again. My mother wasn't harmed in the accident. But, yes, her car was totaled and, yes, I had to go pick up a very rattled mama while her car was getting towed away. On 9/11. Anyway, what I wanted to talk about is the god damn ring. I probably should have gone to
Kalamazoo in the last week pick the ring up for my custody share. But I know she needs it more than I do right now, so I didn't. The ring was ruined in the accident on 9/11. It's a garnet, they are fragile. The airbag explosion ruined it. Total shards. So she put it in a drawer and it sat there for a good long while. It's a gorgeous ring. I took it one day and she didn't care that I took it because it was ruined. I put layers of clear nail polish on the stone and it was not as beautiful but it was really pretty and I wore it for years like that.When Eric and I got married, he got the damaged garnet changed out for me as a gift. I didn't tell my mom. And like ten years later, she saw the ring (I can't remember how that happened) and demanded to have it back. So we share custody of it now. It used to be every six months or so we would exchange it or a temporary exchange when one of needed strength. These days, she needs it more than I do, so she just keeps it. This day sucks. I can't believe how much it impacts me even all these years later.
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