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2023-05-04 - 12:45 p.m.
I bought a little black dress eight years ago or so. I'm not a little black dress sort of gal. But for some reason, I tried it on when I was shopping for an outfit to wear to my epic Scorpions concert and it looked amazing on me. I don't like to brag...but, it looks amazing on me. I bought it. And I didn't wear it, ever. And all these years later, it still has the tags on it. The restaurant I work at is southern themed. It's all bourbon and southern food and we have a huge Kentucky Derby day on Saturday. We aren't required to, but it's been strongly suggested that we do, dress up for the day in derby type stuff. So today I'm going to the craft store to get plastic flowers so I can make a big hat. (I hate the derby, by the way, it's disgusting and I'll end up in a fury about animal abuse all night...) My dilemma, other than the animal abuse, friends, is that I really want to wear my Whisper is a smokeshow little black dress and I'm having a hard time deciding if I should or if I should wear my pretty blue floral dress that is much more me. I kind of want to be hot for a day. I'm fifty. I had one summer back in my early twenties when I decided I was going to be hot(it only lasted a summer, I then reverted back to my frump). I wore the skimpiest of skimpy dresses and shorts and really did it up. And, I swear to god, I had people crashing their bikes into things when they rode by me, people writing songs about me, a woman at a concert followed me to the bathroom and grabbed my arm and said, "you're the hottest person I've ever seen and my husband can't stop looking at you and I can't be mad at him about it because I can't stop looking at you, either." (She was probably looking for some sort of tryst but I'm just going to take it as I was hot as f that day.) I kind of want to do that again. I think I want to be hot for a hot second before I don't have the chance again. Fifty. I'm fifty. I should wear the little black dress and make people fall over. Anyway, I have to go to the craft store and get fake flowers. If I wear the hot black dress, I want to have bright red flowers and all sorts of sparkle. If I wear my blue floral I'll have to get blue and pink flowers for the hat. It's a conundrum, deciding on the person you're going to be. |
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