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2023-01-19 - 12:59 a.m.
My mother is not supposed to know about this diary. I started it 24 years ago (WTF?) and back then I was still a "kid" and was still hiding stuff from my mom. And she lived right down the road and was always at my house and I was always at hers and she found my super secret diary and didn't say anything but would make references that made me know that she read my super secret diary but I didn't say anything to let her know I knew she read it. Anyway. Because she's not supposed to know about this diary (though she's my first reader of every post) and because none of you know her in person...I am not supposed to be talking about this. It's for her to tell. But I'm going to tell a little anyway only because my head is all a fluster and this dear diary has always been my put it together place. This isn't a literary foray for me. This has been my place where I just say what I'm gonna say. So. My mother has cancer. She, and we, are embarking on a journey that is not in any way, close to our usual family drama heartbreak this can only be fiction sort of thing. We're all a fucking wreck. Things are different on this cancer journey and I know that we are still trying to gather and place things. So, basically, what I'm saying is that my dear diary is going to get a lot of use for a bit. Because I have a lot of say what I'm gonna say to say. |
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