DELVING BETWEEN THE TOES OF LIFE....I AM TOEJAM


2022-06-26 - 2:02 p.m.

I had a double at work yesterday. So I was first cut. And we were slow. I was going to stick around and get some cleaning and organizing done while I had the opportunity. We’re always so darn busy. It’s difficult to get anything extra done. So, being able to leave early was a good opportunity to get some stuff done. Maddy took over the bar and I started a project. And in walks a customer who, although very sweet, talks my ear off. And he’s a low talker, mumbler and I have two ruptured ear drums so it takes a lot of concentration and energy to hear him and it’s exhausting. But I don’t want to ignore him because he is so nice and I’ve been waiting on him through three restaurants in the last 16 years. So I gave him my attention and my head started pounding. So I decided to give up my project and go home and just then, another low talker, sweet as hell mumbler came in and I had to talk to him for a bit and my head was just pounding. But, it’s my job to make people feel welcome and they always want to hear about my life (it’s so exciting, cats, food and now I gush on and on about that man I love in Texas). So I talked to him for a few minutes, got him his drink, ordered his food, talked to the other low talker for a minute about the wine he had brought in for us to try and then I was just gathering my stuff and the third low talker mumbler we have came in. It was unbelievable. My ears were completely strained and my head was pounding. At that point I simply fled. I said bye to Maddy and I fled. I left my water container, my apron with money in it, my hand lotion and my lip gloss. I just fled.

But, even with burning ears and a headache. I talked on the phone with my love for a long time. We have a FaceTime call planned today. It will be the first time I see him in animated form and I’m so excited that I’m kind of shaking a bit. I got it bad. I often feel like I’m going to faint when I think about him. Which means, I feel like I’m going to faint 24 hours a day.

It’s hot and humid today. The cats are all just parked in the coolest spots they can find. I don’t like hot and humid and I don’t like that the cats are hot and humid. But I do find cats completely sprawled out in a pancake to be ridiculously cute.

I have to get my chores done before my date and pull myself together. Do I wear a cute dress? Or just show up in my usual pajamas that I have been wearing for twenty five years? Should I whiten my teeth? Should I go buy that plumping lip gloss stuff for my impossibly thin lips? I suppose it’s fortunate that I can’t do either thing. I’ve never been able to use tooth whitening stuff. It just makes my teeth burn for days. I’m a very sensitive person. And that plumping lip gloss stuff will just give me a coldsore. Very sensitive.

Anyway, that’s all. I just had to sit down for a second in my manic mess of love and let it out. Back to chores now. And I have a lot of them.

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