DELVING BETWEEN THE TOES OF LIFE....I AM TOEJAM


2016-06-24 - 2:14 a.m.

There are things I should tell you.

I have a boyfriend. For example. I should tell you this. You would find that interesting since the last you knew I was married and I still am married.

I will tell you these things. I need to.

The cats are great. I can't believe how lucky I am.

What I mostly wanted to say tonight was that my soul is damaged. I know this. I have a lot of repair work to do. Every day I get stronger about this. Every single day I am putting a foot forward. Tonight, as I was leaving work, I knew I needed something extra strong, I needed a huge infusion of soul. I sat for a few long moments in the parking lot and thought about what music I wanted for my drive home. I ended up knowing without a doubt that it was going to be Jeff Buckley and I turned it on and and pulled out of the parking lot. I was listening to the first song on Grace and decided I needed to skip over everything to listen to Hallelujah immediately. I was just turning onto to the main road as it started to play and at that exact moment there was the biggest, slowest, most beautiful shooting star I've ever seen. Pivotal. This is all so pivotal.

I need to be alone.

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