2016-05-25 - 1:33 a.m.
I've not been writing at all lately. I see the problem with this when I go back through my old diary land entries and my old journal entries and I get some ah ha moments. Some moments of closure and realization. Sometimes we just don't see that every day we are living important lessons. But, I've not been able to write lately. I'm that far gone. So the important thing that I want to note today, because I suddenly see that I have been missing a lot and even if I can't write it all down in its entirety, I certainly should be writing something, anything...today's lesson is that I need to work on my self esteem. If I'm in a situation where I feel that I am not performing well I either need to put myself 100% into it and be the best I can be or I need to abort the fucking mission. I need to be operating at more than .05% self esteem, I don't have time to be beaten down. That is all. |
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