2014-11-03 - 11:28 p.m.

Weird times, man. Weird times.

I'm in the middle of a nightmare string of cat tragedy. We are shell shocked here. Every sneeze we hear makes one of us panic.

And then, in the world around me...I have friend who is currently in the hospital awaiting a heart transplant. From what I understand, if it doesn't happen pretty fast, he's not going to live. I haven't heard anything in a couple days from him. Most of me wants to believe that's because he got his heart and he is recovering. I really hope that's the case.

Another friend of mine has a daughter going in for major surgery tomorrow morning. This girl has had non stop tumor growth in her face for the last three years. This is the fifth major surgery she has had. She is nineteen. This surgery will be the most extensive yet. She will not be able to eat anything for the next two months.

And, the mother of one of my best friends growing up killed herself yesterday. She's had a chronic, painful condition for a couple years and apparently had been suggesting suicide for a while. She finally did it. Her kids are furious with her along with their sadness because she never tried to help herself, hadn't changed her diet or done anything to make herself better because she said life wasn't worth living if you didn't enjoy it. I hate this stuff. I hate it. She was right. And they were right. I hate that we should balance things. I hate that if she had eaten food that she hated she might have had some relief from the pain.

So that's that. I feel so lucky about so many things. I feel so lucky that my mother DID decide to heal herself and I feel so lucky that I am "healthy" and that I've never had any major disturbances in my life. I used to never believe in luck, but lately I am seeing that it is a huge presence in life.


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