2013-04-09 - 11:35 a.m.

I either have a lot of things to do today or I have nothing to do today. I can't decide which modality I want to go with. Obviously I am leaning towards doing nothing all day. I bought twenty books yesterday and it's rainy and gloomy outside and I would love to just sit around in bed with a pot of tea and go through all my new books.

But...I also haven't properly cleaned the house in two weeks and I have painting projects to attend and that fat opossum was in the garage again last night and knocked over a bunch of food dishes and made a big mess and now I have to wash all the rugs out there again and...well, I've been waking up for the last few mornings just feeling guilty from my lack of getting anything done in this life and I am turning FORTY THIS year and I am acting like a fifteen year old. I cannot turn forty and have these painting projects still lingering. I cannot turn forty and still have orange countertops in the kitchen. A forty year old needs and adult house.

There are so many things! We have trees that need to be trimmed and prettied up, we have this horrible old flower bed right smack in front of our house that was probably beautiful once but I've NEVER touched it so every year it just over grows with weeds and looks stupid and derelict and I can't even look in that direction for the entire summer without wanting to die. I attempted, one year, to take care of it. I went out there with a shovel and clippers and just planned to get rid of everything in it but then I found milkweed and all sorts of other important weeds in there so I couldn't do it. The next year I went out there around this time and planned to dig everything up before it grew into useful and important weeds but quickly found out that it is way to rocky to just dig. So we got an estimate from a landscape company. FOR EIGHT HUNDRED DOLLARS (or something that ridiculous. Anyway. This year I must do something.

So that is all. I guess I'm going to attempt to get some things done today.


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