2011-07-19 - 5:10 p.m.

I got two magazines in the mail today. Which will help me get through this heat wave at least for today. I have panic attacks in the morning thinking about how I can get through the day...for real. But I am OK for today and Thursday. Wednesday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday are going to be difficult. Today I can read my magazines and watch the TV shows from last night and eat mozzarella and basil. Thursday I am getting my hair cut and buying a dress for my brother's wedding. I am actually glad that it is so hot...because otherwise I would be totally pissed about the whole dress thing. I hate shopping, I hate spending money and I hate that I so fat and disgusting right now and I will have to buy some matronly hideousness in which to conceal my fatitude. Depressing. But it's hot and what else do I have to do on my day off? I certainly don't want to sit around my non air conditioned house that I refuse to clean anymore.

Summer is the worst thing ever. And it always happens that I start getting motivated for life just when summer kicks in (which of course is because I get some actual daylight and sun vitamins coursing through my veins again after winter's a cruel irony).

And my twenty pound cat STILL wants to sit on my fucking lap even though it is one thousand degrees outside.



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