2008-02-29 - 11:23 p.m.

Must find a job. I am getting depressed. Which is all kinds of fucked up because once I find a job I'm going to be depressed about THAT. I am not doing well at this whole human crap lately. I just want to crawl into a hole and not speak.

This has consistently been my dream for as long as I can remember.

I wonder why I have no ambition?

Is it possible that the only thing I was really "meant" for was being a stay at home mother? Because that's the only thing I really, really want to do even though I don't have children and don't want children.

I watched "Away from Her" tonight. Julie Christie took my breath away. Wow. Why can't I be Julie Christie?

That is all.


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