DELVING BETWEEN THE TOES OF LIFE....I AM TOEJAM


2008-02-19 - 4:12 p.m.

Oof. Okay. So. I just received the estimate for the fence. Five grand, give or take a few hundred dollars. We also have to buy a new water softener for $2,000 and a new roof for whatever that is costing these days.

For me, the roof is obviously the most important (part of our offer on this house was that $4000 of closing costs were paid by the seller because we knew the roof had to be replaced this year). But damn, if someone told me that the roof could last until fall...I would totally get this fence put in before I did anything else. Because I desperately want to be outside with my cats when Spring hits. If I don't have the fence I know I won't go outside at all because I will feel too guilty leaving them inside. This is a problem.

I need a job.

This whole needing a job thing is really depressing for me. (and that is my excuse for why I am drinking wine at 4 pm on a Tuesday)

I want to work at a very specific place. I want to work from 6 am until noon or one. I want the menu to reflect good, moral practices (ie; free range chicken eggs and ethically raised and butchered meat (I would rather work in a vegetarian restaurant but the only one around here is 30+ miles away and is only open at night).) I want to work with people who feel the same way I do about life and living.

These demands of mine are a problem.

That stupid wine bar I was working at was good in that the chef was pretty arrogant (aren't they all?) and used very fresh, very clean ingredients. I didn't have much hassle with the food at that restaurant, even though a steak was the star of the menu. And I loved being surrounded by wine. Had that woman that owned the place not been such a fucking psycho (I just got word that the new girl that had been hired to take my place quit after one week. Leaving the psycho woman with ONE person on her waitstaff. Which is pretty cool considering that she needs at least three people on a Saturday night.) I would have stayed there for a long time. Even though it was a dinner place. I want to work breakfast, ideally, but I could handle dinner if it's the perfect place.

Anyway...the part about this job search thing that is so difficult is that I don't know where I am. I know exactly two restaurants in this vague area. I know the restaurant I worked at and I know the fancy restaurant in our village. (I can't work there because I like to go there) So because I don't know anything about this area...I feel that I am kind of forced to take another job that I don't exactly want while I am searching for the perfect place. And...that probably means working dinner again. Which I despise.

Ugh.

Basically. I just need someone to send me about $10,000. Then I could take my time.

Dammit. By June I will have my privacy fence. !!!! I will!!!! And I will be outside planting flowers and vegetables while my cats mill about. !!!

(sigh)

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