2004-11-30 - 5:57 a.m.

It's strange. Two years ago I was used to being without Eric for six weeks at a time. That was what I got used to. I had this routine thing I would fall into. A week of complete despair followed by a week of dedicated productivity and then two weeks of normal life and then two weeks of manic hell while I waited impatiently for him to get here. But, since Spring we had been seeing one another at least once a month (how that worked out I will never remember, but it did) and now it has been about three weeks since he was here and I woke this morning in that manic, impatient hell that usually signifies that he will be here really soon. But I still have another month to go. Apparenly I got used to the month thing. I will say this again (because I also said it last February, this WILL be our last long seperation. This is it. So I should be living the hermit thing up. I don't know if I am going to have a problem living with someone, because I have never lived with someone whom I was involved romantically, but if I do find myself eight months down the road wishing I had a couple days to myself, completely to myself, I am going to kick myself in the ass if I don't make the most of this last month of mine living alone. It isn't as though things will change a lot, Eric works a lot a lot of hours and he is always travelling for work so I will probably have more time alone than I will have with him...but there is always the luxery of not having to think of someone else when you do something at home...even if he is not there. Like not flushing the toilet everytime I use it. I hate wasting water and since I know that I will go to the bathroom at least three times before leaving for work in the morning (and I'm talking liquid here...I like to adhere to the "if it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down," rule)I never flush the toilet until I am leaving. But that is gross to do if someone is sharing a home with you. Or my coffee cup habit. I will let every coffee cup I have (nine) pile up on the table before I will remove them and wash them. That is also a gross habit if you are sharing a home. Anyway....

I've been sleeping a lot lately. Because apparently I need to. It isn't the kind of sleeping you do when you just don't want to be awake. I've been totally tired. And my eye, since I started sleeping a lot, has finally stopped twitching. It's been two months of twitching. Not I am two days clear of twitching.

I just read that eating two eggs for breakfast helps you lose weight because they are more filling (for the same amount of calories) than other breakfast food. And it is SO true. I eat two eggs for breakfast at least four times a week and on the days when I eat eggs at seven I don't even think about food again until about four in the afternoon. If I have cereal and toast I am hungry again at eleven.

Just FYI.


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