2004-05-20 - 8:21 p.m.

Yesterday I was the closest to snapping that I have ever been. Which was strange because for the last two weeks or so I have been in a pretty gleeful mood. Things had been feeling good. I mean, the prospect of things was feeling good. I wasn't sitting here in morbid mania mode, I was sure something good was going to happen. Even when my car started pouring gas...I still had a really good outlook on "tomorrow". Yesterday I wanted to crawl into a hole.

And that is why I woke today and actually did something about it.

Woke at 7...did some minor cleaning so I could at least see what needed to be done.

New ELECTRIC lawnmower was delivered at noon. Old GAS, loud, massive lawnmower was then taken away. (I traded a customer at work who fiddles with lawnmowers, $50 and my not working lawn mower for this fantastic electric mower.) I was apprehensive at first about the electric thing. But, if I was going to get a lawn mower and stop paying the rip off artist that mows my lawn now, it was going to be a NON gas mower. I am going to totally get away from gas sooner or later. Anyway, the electric mower is much more peaceful than regular mowers. And it is easy to use. The only problem I forsee and it is very likely, is my running over the cord.

12:30. Worked on some recipes. I am entering a recipe contest. It was very difficult for me to cook while measuring things. I cannot enter a contest with a recipe that reads, enough oatmeal to make the mixture dry enough so it doesn't stick to your hands. A smidge of salt, a bunch of, the thing that I make A LOT of didn't turn out how it usually does because I was measuring and it messed up the magic. I'll try again tomorrow.

1:30. Made fresh lemonade.

1:45 Finished reading Lady Oracle for the fourth time in five months.

2:45 Mother and Brother stopped by for lemonade and I made them try seiten. This is the newest food item I have been experimenting with. It is good when made properly. Brother LOVED it and ate almost the whole pan. Wants more tomorrow.

3:30 Started the chaos....moving furniture...emptying boxes in the middle of the floor so I can organize better...trying to fix windows...I filled five bags with garbage, moved my dining room table to the living room and moved one of the couches into the dining room. Why? Because I installed an air conditioner in the living room and the couch would have blocked it...but more than that...Eric and I always eat in the living room anyway. And I have a problem with using the dining room table as a place to store...whatever. This solves it all and now I have a really cute little reading room where the dining room used to be. And I am just dreaming about a week from now when Eric and I are in the cool living room playing trivial pursuit at the table instead of getting all cramped up from sitting on the floor.

And is 8:30 and I have to go to bed.

I feel very accomplished today and feel as though I have made some minor, yet very significant changes. That is good.


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