2003-12-04 - 2:48 p.m.

I feel like a complete dork. There are two things that contributed to my total display of public dorkism today and the possibility that my mail lady may or may not have to go the hospital because of the heartattack I most likely gave her.

One contributing factor. I am an environmentalist, I hate people that do not build new houses that are energy efficient. I also hate people who just waste things, like water and heat. But, I am also a poor environmentalist and therefore cannot afford to make my own home energy efficient at this time. I have numerous drafts in this house so I have to turn my heat to ninety to get it cozy warm in here. But in doing that I would totally be wasting heat and energy. So, I keep my heat at 55 degrees and I wear layers of clothing while at home. Today's outfit is three pairs of mismatched socks, sweatpants over long underwear, two sweatshirts, my magenta scarf and the crowning gem of my outfit, my five dollar thrift shop fake fur coat that is big, warm and makes me look like I am wearing a brown bear draped across my shoulders.

Second contributing factor. I am VERY IMPATIENTLY awaiting the arrival of my Bedazzler and cheesecake on a stick. My brother sent me a Bedazzler for my birthday and I have a pile of things I cannot wait to bedazzle so I need that thing NOW. And my boyfriend told me in a drunken moment last night that he sent me cheesecake on a stick (one of the most decadent and wonderful things you could ever get) for my birthday and that it should have been here yesterday. So all day, since nine am I have been rushing to the door every time I hear a truck outside. I'll fling the door open and stand there totally dejected when I realize it isn't either of my much anticipated items. So just a few minutes ago I heard the dog barking next door and ran to the door expecting one of the trucks to finally be here. I opened the door in a big, forceful gust only to find a stunnned mail lady falling backwards off my steps at the sight of Bear Woman lunging from inside a normally quiet house.

Poor woman. And I feel like a moron.


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