|
2002-01-14 - 2:23 p.m.
Between having too much idle time in which to let my mind flow with thought and still plodding through that damn Tom Robbins book only to be sidetracked at every avenue by some deep and interesting thought of his, I am now feeling more and more inept at this life thing that I am trying to pull off. I feel mediocre. And the reason that frustrates me is that I KNOW I am more than mediocre, I just haven't yet found the way to let myself go. As much as I hate to admit it, I read books written for the sole purpose of releasing writers block, books that talk about writing. In one, I don't remember which one or who wrote it, the one piece of advice that struck me was this. "There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein." Now this makes sense to me because when I think quietly to myself I am brilliant. It is when I think out loud that I start sounding like a buffoon. I need to find that vein that feeds my silent, brilliant thoughts and slice it open to bleed upon the page. Unfortunately the only vein that seems to bleed is the one that produces lack luster thoughts. I don't even feel worthy of having an on-line diary at this juncture. I feel myself getting depressed about it at times. Not because I want more people to read my diary or because I want to be able to keep the masses entertained and enthralled, I just want to seem like an intelligent person for once. I think brilliance must be the most depressing state to live in. So on a different note....beach real good today. I fell asleep for an hour until some jack ass that keeps the beach safe and clean tore by my ears on his stupid little cart with no muffler. So I came back up to the house to do some reading on the deck. Where I am is actually about ten miles north of Miami. I am in Hollywood. Home to afternoon karaoke fests in the pavillion across the street from the house. I guess it could be worse, it could be young people doing the singing. I could be listening to someones rendition of Purple Rain right now instead of listening to old people singing Frank Sinatra along with an accordian accompaniest. Not so bad. By the way, would anyone like to go to England and rescue Prince Harry with me? Maybe we can get good old Bush give Charles some of those dangerous pretzels and all royal troubles could cease. The news is great down here. They actually interrupted programming to tell us that Bush had choked on a pretzel while watching a football game and had passed out. I was laughing through the whole announcement while Jon just glared at me. I thought it was hysterical, what can I say? They are also referring to Prince Harry as Prince Harry Pothead. Miami news rocks. |
| 