DELVING BETWEEN THE TOES OF LIFE....I AM TOEJAM


2014-04-24 - 1:10 a.m.

Tonight one of my favorite customers of all time came in and ordered his usual vodka and then, when he drank it a bit faster than normal, told me he'd had a bad day. "Why", I asked. "Because I've been in the emergency room all day, I guess my kidneys were failing, but I'm all good now."

When he dies because of alcohol, and he's going to, I'm going to have to go to his funeral and look at his devastated children and grandchildren and know that I played a part in his death.

Then, after he left, I had a group of three total douchebags come to bar. One of them, within a span of twenty seconds, used the phrases, "just hustlin', man", "I'm livin' the dream" and, "I'm killin' it every minute". I actually had to stop what I was doing to write those phrases down because I just couldn't believe he uttered all that ridiculous douchebaggery in such a short amount of seconds.

Then, there was big server drama. One of the waitstaff was in tears by the end of the night. It's ridiculous that this occurs. ALL of us are over the age of forty.

I really want to not work anymore. And if I must work, I want to be solitary. I know, this is the dream of most people. But damn, surely I can think of something solitary that would make about the same amount of money I make now? I really just want to be a farmer. It's a shame I suck at farming though. I'm trying. This year I should have the best garden in my history.

Rudy was better today than I thought he would be. I expected weeks of hiding in the furthest corner he could find and no eating or drinking for days. But he ate a bunch of food and drank a bunch of water and used his litter box and was hanging out in the window today. He's back under the bed now but he seems to be there because he likes it not because he is hiding. He's back to hissing at me every time I come near him but I am ignoring it and he lets me pet him a bit. This is going to be quite a project but I don't think it will be as much of a project as I originally thought it would be.

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