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2002-04-01 - 6:46 p.m.
Twas the night before Easter and all through my home, I was yelling and screaming at the
person on the phone. Yes, the night before Easter and I found myself in a four hour long
conversation on religion in which I pretty much denounced Christianity as a bunch of
mumbo jumbo and actually made the person on the other line doubt his faith. That was
not my intention, but I had a lot to say and a lot of questions I needed answered. Falling
asleep that night I started to feel a little scared. There is a small part of me that still has
the fear of God and I felt shaken that I had said out loud, �I do not believe in the
Bible, it is fiction.� When I woke up on Easter morning I decided that I could no longer
celebrate these Christian holidays because to do so would be hypocritical of me. I
intended to inform my mother of this decision as soon as I got to her house to hunt for
Easter eggs with my little brother. But as soon as I stumbled out of bed my telephone
rang and I hear my mother�s strangled voice saying, �I...........hrpmh, cough,
gag.......I.........choke, retch.......I.........I..........I�llcallyouback,� click goes the line. So I
throw on my clothes thinking she is being murdered and then the phone rings and we go
through the exact same scenario as above. Three times. Finally on the fourth call she
manages to tell me she is sick and needs a Coke.
My mother had a migraine on Easter. For one hour I sat on the edge of her bed while she
tried to tell me between blackouts what she needed me to do. First and foremost I needed
to pick my little brother up at his friends house. And she wanted me to be sure to explain
to him that the Bunny hadn�t come to the house because she was sick and he didn�t want
to catch anything. �Mother, Taur is fifteen years old, he doesn�t believe in the Bunny,� I
tell her.
�Yes....gag, spittle....he....holdonIgottapuke....does,� this apparition of my mother tells
me, �He really really does.�
I go to his friends house to pick him up. He comes out spewing Rap at me. His friend,
who he has known since they were eight, leans in my windows and eyes me, �So, I see
you�re still a babe,� he tells me. I roll the window up and peel out.
�Taur, Mom is really sick so we are doing Easter tomorrow,� I tell him.
�Yeah, so what mother-fucker? That Bunny still brought me money, I don�t give a shit,�
he replies in his �thug� voice.
�Taur, the �Bunny� didn�t come, I told you, Mom is sick,� I say while flashing him a
come-on-I-know-you-don�t-believe-in-the-Bunny-look.
�What the fuck? The bastard didn�t come just because Mom is sick? That don�t make no
fucking sense, I�ll kick his ass, I need cash for the girlies you know, � he�s pumping his
hand in the air along with the Rap he�s listening to.
I�m thinking this is hilarious. This little jack-ass is spouting off profanity, coming home
after school with lipstick on his neck, watching porn whenever he can and stealing my
Victoria Secret catalogs....and he STILL BELIEVES IN THE EASTER BUNNY! I
really, really think he does.
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